Welcome to Rose Recap for The Bachelorette. I'm so excited for this season and love JoJo (and her Mom)!
I would be lying if I said the first time a commercial for the season came on I didn't jump up and dance around.
Did you guys see the guys pictures and bios on ABC? Is it just me or do all the guys look the same and just ehhh? Let's hope that it was just bad pictures and they're more impressive on the show.
Can we talk about JoJo's bod as she's walking on the beach? Would someone please get me her trainer's info -- and her stylist? Meanwhile, I'm over here eating Nutella macaroons while watching. Whoops.
Before JoJo can start her journey, she meets up with former bachelorettes Kaitlyn, Ali and Des. I love seeing all these former bachelorettes together, but since Des is the only one from the show who is married, I'd take her advice over the others.
Time to meet some of the "extraordinary" bachelors before JoJo does. Doesn't Grant look like the hot felon that made headlines a few years ago?
C'mon James, really, you're job description is "Bachelor Superfan"? We know that's just a creative way to say you're unemployed.
And then there's Evan who runs a chain of Erectile Dysfunction places. At least he has an actual job title...I guess. Alright, I have a soft spot for Luke. He's a farmer, a war vet and went to West Point. (I know people who went to West Point and went to a dance there my senior year of high school.)
First out of the limo is Jordan and he tells a sweet story that his parents only knew each other for a few months and have been married for 36 years.
Robby lightens the mood and references JoJo's mom drinking straight from the bottle.
Meanwhile, Daniel's job is Canadian -- another lame way to say unemployed.
James Taylor steps out of the car and my eyes roll so far back in my head, is anyone else having Wes Hayden flashbacks?
Jonathan comes in saying he's half-Irish and the Irish half is his lower half...another eye roll.
And then there's Santa, he legit tells her his name is Saint Nick and then gives her a present.
Fun fact about Wells, one of my best friends has met him a couple times so I have a soft spot for him off the bat without knowing anything about him. He showed up with All-4-One singing "I Swear."
Alex steals JoJo first at the cocktail party and instantly puts a target on his back. JoJo says she's looking for an instant connection with someone and cue Jordan. The music changes as soon as they cut to him and they seem so at ease with one another already.
Will steals the first kiss of the season using his fortune teller but JoJo wasn't really feeling it. Then Jordan steals her and has the first real kiss of the season. JoJo is digging her time with Chad, but he seems really arrogant in his ITMs and has been putting other guys down all night.
The guys are really taking advantage of the free alcohol and Daniel really indulges in it and pokes Evan in the belly button which really puzzles/angers him. If only it stopped there, Daniel then takes clothes off and jumps in the pool. #theresoneveryseason The guys are so drunk and even walks in on JoJo's interviews but she stays classy and handles it well.
Cut to Ali playing Fur Elise on a piano that just magically appeared and girls everywhere are swooning. Give a guy an instrument and he instantly becomes 10000x hotter to me.
JoJo sitting on Santa's lap is so awkward. Can he please ditch the costume?
Luke gains another point in my book when he gives JoJo a pair of cowboy boots. I love me a good pair of boots!
It's time for the first impression rose and no surprise here, it goes to Jordan. Did you guys notice how crazy his hair was acting while she gave him the rose? Someone please get him a comb and some hairspray!
It's rose ceremony time so naturally that means it's time for Chris Bukowski, Nick Viall, Jake Pavelka to show up.
I loved Jake on Jillian's season of The Bachelorette but was let down with his season of The Bachelor then was ready to be rid of him after Dancing With the Stars and Bachelor Pad. But it's been a few years since he's been on camera so it's time to try to get back in the spotlight. Little did we know that Jake is a close family friend and JoJo says he's almost like a brother to her and she has no idea why he would be there. He says he wants her to find love and wish her luck. Please, like he couldn't have done that over the phone or before the show filmed? No, of course not, he needed to do that on camera.
Back to the rose ceremony, here's who's continuing on the journey for love with JoJo: Luke, Wells, James Taylor, Grant, Derek, Christian, Chad, Chase, Alex, Robby, Brandon, James F., Ali, Santa (aka one of the Nicks), Will, James S. (James is the new Lauren this season -- there were 4 last season!), Vinny, Evan and Daniel.
