Manners Monday: Thank Yous

Call me old fashioned, but I love handwritten letters.  In this day and age where everything is so instantaneous and digital, there's something so fun about opening your ACTUAL mailbox, not the one on your phone, and seeing a letter there.  I love opening an envelope and seeing someone's handwriting on paper, not Times New Roman on a bright white screen.  And where putting pen to paper takes longer than striking keys on a keyboard, you know that for that little bit of time, someone was thinking of you.

Nowadays, it's becoming less and less common to get a "Thank You" card in the mail.  It's so quick and convenient to send someone a text that says "Thanks," but that doesn't cut it.  If someone took the time out of their day to attend your wedding, birthday, etc. and spend money on you, the least you can do to show your appreciation is to send a thank you.

According to Emily Post, it's never wrong to send a thank you note.  The acceptable time frame for sending thank yous is up to 3 months after receiving the gift.  While it's best to get the note out as soon as possible, it's better late than never.

When it comes to writing thank yous, they don't have to be novels, just thoughtful.  If you have tons of notes to write, write them in small batches.  Writing 100 thank yous in one sitting sounds daunting, but writing them in sets of 10 doesn't sound nearly as bad.  Happy writing!

Manners Monday: Wedding Guest Etiquette

Happy Manners Monday and welcome to wedding season!  This week we are looking into wedding guest etiquette.  Here are some Do's and Don'ts to make sure you're the perfect guest.

Do:

• RSVP: It's just common courtesy, and send it in by the date requested.  If an emergency or something comes up and you can't attend, let the host know immediately.
• Arrive on time: If the invite says the ceremony starts at 4:30, that means the bride is walking down the aisle at 4:30.  This is one of those cases where if you aren't early, you're late.
• Send a gift:  Even if you can't make it to the ceremony, you're still expected to send a gift.  And don't forget to use the registry...it's there for a reason!
• Wear proper attire: Under no circumstances are jeans appropriate.  If you aren't sure of what to wear, ask someone familiar with the wedding.
• Have a good time: Get out on the dance floor, make new friends and smile!  Even if you aren't, look like you're having fun and don't forget to take home your party favor!

Don't

• Assume you have a plus one: Unless your invitation says a guest is invited, they aren't and don't ask for one either.  This goes for kids, too.
• Use your phone: It's tempting to check Facebook or text someone during the reception, but don't.  Be present and in the moment.
• Get sloppy drunk: Stay in control, this day isn't about you and how much you can drink, it's about celebrating the bride and groom.  Make sure the attention stays on them...not you.
• Wear white: Unless the invitation asks guests to wear white, save it for the bride.

Manners Monday: Wedding Etiquette -- Bridal Party

With wedding season rapidly approaching, I thought it would be a good time to introduce a new column: Manners Monday.  And what better way to kick off the new series than with wedding etiquette?  I'm going to break this down into two posts: the bridal party and wedding guests.  This week we are looking into the  specific duties of the bridal party.  Who is responsible for what?  When I decided to do this, I quickly turned to Emily Post and Lauren Conrad to start my research.  Along with The Knot, here's what they had to say:

The Bride and Family:

• Pay for the venue of the ceremony
• Pay for floral arrangement of venue, bridesmaid bouquets and flower girl flowers
• Pay for photos and videos
• Pay for all invitations, announcements and wedding programs
• Host the reception

The Groom and Family:

• Pay for officiant and marriage license
• Pay for bride's bouquet, boutonnieres and corsages for mothers and grandmothers
• Pay for honeymoon
• Hosts the rehearsal dinner

Maid/Matron of Honor:

• Helps the bride with wedding shopping including bridesmaid dresses and accessories
• Helps with party favors and addressing invitations
• Oversees bridesmaids and make sure they have proper attire
• Pays for her dress and accessories
• Carries an "emergency kit" throughout the day
• Arranges veil and train after bride 
• Holds the groom's ring and bride's bouquet during ceremony
• Witnesses the signing of the marriage certificate
• Gives speech during reception
• Helps during and after the reception: dancing, bouquet toss, gathering guests for cake cutting, collects cake topper
• Helps bride change into going away clothes and takes care of the wedding dress and accessories after the reception
• Plans and hosts bridal shower and bachelorette party
• Keeps a record of gifts received
• Responsible for a shower and wedding gift
• Be there to help out however, whenever and wherever she can

Bridesmaids:

• Assist MOH with bridal shower
• Help MOH however possible
• Greets guests and encourages mingling at the reception
• Supervise the flower girl and ring bearer
• Pay for their dress and accessories

Best Man

• Organizes the bachelor party
• Helps groom however possible
• Seats mother of the bride at the ceremony
• Holds the bride's ring during ceremony
• Witnesses the signing of the marriage certificate
• Gives a speech at the reception
• Encourages dancing at reception
• Helps arrange getaway car for the bride and groom
• Oversees groomsmen and makes sure they are on time 
• Delivers wedding presents to the newlywed's house
• Pays for own attire and transportation

Groomsmen

• Help best man in whatever ways possible
• Escorts guests to their seats
• Helps decorate the getaway car
• Pays for own attire and transportation

Ushers

• Help set up ceremony and light candles
• Greet and help seat guests
• Hand out programs